Husband and I were both born under the sign of Taurus, which means we also share a daily horoscope, something I read aloud at breakfast if it seems particularly relevant. If horoscopes can ever be classified as relevant. Today’s words of wisdom for the May babies were, “People think you are a bit more talented and desirable than you really are.” I mean, WHAT? Talk about a backhanded celestial slap. Normally, Husband just glances up from the Important News Section and smiles at whatever pap I’m reading him, but today he threw his hands up in mock incredulity and said, “And they expect to sell papers with this?” Perhaps Son will have a better day with the Pisces prediction, “You easily find ways to make what you do for a living fun.” As it happens, Son really enjoys his work, but what about all the Pisces morticians? Tweak it just right, and any horoscope turns ghoulish.
That goes for consumer product warnings as well. Last week, Daughter was over and we were discussing the various pros and cons of non-stick cookware. She’s in the market to replace her pots and pans, and she’s all about being green. I told her I’m thrilled with my T-FAL skillet and I pulled it out of the cabinet for her to inspect. It’s seen a year of use with no flaking of the non-stick coating whatsoever. I use the folded cardboard insert it came with to cushion it from the pan stacked on top, and Daughter opened the insert to learn more about the skillet’s composition. She gave a chortle as she read the following:
Q. If the cookware is accidentally overheated, will there be fumes and will they be hazardous?
A. Any material overheated high enough will give off fumes. Fumes from overheated non-stick cookware will not adversely affect humans or household pets . . . with the exception of birds. Since birds have particularly sensitive respiratory systems, they are susceptible to fumes. Users should observe good cooking practices, and never allow non-stick cookware to overheat. For their safety, always keep birds in a well-ventilated room away from the kitchen.
By all means, keep Tweety in the den when you’re cooking so she can evolve without interruption into the intelligent ruler of our Teflon-addled brains.
Q. What would happen if the non-stick coating peeled and was accidentally eaten by someone?
A. T-FAL’s non-stick coating is formulated not to chip or peel under normal household use. If particles from the coating are accidentally ingested there is no danger. The main ingredient of the non-stick coating, called PTFE, is inert and will pass directly through the body without being absorbed.
I’m sure Tweety will laugh her beak off as you poop out a pile of PTFE. If you’re an Aquarius, this could be a propitious event because according to the paper, “A thing of real beauty is to be found right on your own doorstep.” No advice about cleaning it off, though. Of course, you can always holler for a Taurus if you need a hand. Today we’re desperate.
In honor of St. Paddy’s Day, today’s Fotos are from our 2010 trip to Ireland
chess in the woods
Powerscourt Estate, Enniskerry
Kilkenny
Dublin pharmacy window
the greenest of green